About

My name is Jon. I live in New York. I'm a writer for the UCB house sketch team Beige as well as other things. This is a searing look into my beaten and broken psyche, an examination of my own crippling malaise. It's also got funny YouTube videos!

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People I Follow

  • Whistling in the Dark
  • Uptight Citizen
  • Bencin
  • Mark Joyella | @standupkid
  • Learning Curve
  • Travis Helwig
  • Hyperbole Is My Middle Name!
  • #FUTURESH*T
  • Barfing Arts
  • Hal Phillips
  • Uncanny Brett White
  • I Hahaha Hate Myself
  • Figure it out.
  • Me In My Place ® - beautiful women at home
  • Mi Vida
  • Things I Find
  • [the urban fervor]
  • Late Night with Jimmy Fallon
  • The Official Patrick Cotnoir Tumblr
  • Chris Reblogs
  • Hey it's Lou!
  • J. Hermann
  • Veronica Osorio
  • The picture of a sunny day.
  • Meghan O'Keefe
  • this is what love is for
  • stuff
  • Worst Tumblr Ever.
  • so, alex goes...
  • The Chris Gethard Show
  • Kelly Hudson: Citizen Hudson
  • Chris Griswold
  • Brentt Harshman
  • Vintage Disney Parks
  • The Mary Sue
  • living in a shotgun shack
  • Long Naps, Strudel, and Improvisation
  • The Young Turks
  • Official Comedy.
  • the Anthony King
  • Brutality and Chuckles
  • Rich Kids Of Instagram
  • The New Yorker
  • I AM SPO
  • hey i'm brady and:
  • Hot Summer Nights (Won't Last Forever)!
  • Clif Henning
  • Sasheer Zamata
  • Patrick O'Brien
  • Someday I'll wish upon a star...
  • IFC
  • Planetwebber
  • Claire Ayoub Laughing at Things
  • Kerry McGuire
  • Gilmore Gurlz
  • The Blip Blog
  • The Dan Max Fox Blog
  • Connor Ratliff
  • That Dog's Blog
  • Mark Dowling
  • jason flowers. online idiot.
  • Ryan Xilliams
  • John Z Townsend
  • The Uncanny Valley
  • Douglas Widick's Presence on Tumblr
  • thedorseyshawexperience
  • Give 'em Enough Rope
  • Jesse Acini's Online Presence
  • I Genuinely Enjoy Science
  • The Scene - Improvised One Acts
  • evanfordebarden
  • Lovelauren
  • I'm With Kanye
  • pumpkin annie posts
  • Regular Sam
  • Grown Ass Boy
  • iamachilles
  • Today in Fake History
  • Bananagrams Solitaire
  • The Rolling Doughnut
  • wrongcharlie: blog about stuff
  • b-r-double o-k-lyn drama
  • Thank You, Robot
  • stop hitting yourself why are you hitting yourself
  • Trowbridge ---->
  • stephen falk dot com
  • Cory Is Looking At Things
  • Eternally Damned with Sarah Burton
  • Brita James
  • You Rach You Lose
  • Drivele by Jamie Frevele
  • claspy
  • Jason Saenz Comedy
  • Cool Shit/Weird Shit
  • Unlimited Lives!
  • The A.V. Club
  • The Daily Oliver
  • Look at the camera.
  • Kurt Guenther loves Tumblr
  • Tumblr Staff
  • Stephanie Streisand
  • It's Caitlin Time!
  • Beige
  • Morgan Evans
  • syllogisms and metaphors.
  • Sean P. O'Reilly
  • Timmy Loves Julie
  • OVC: CONVERSATIONS FROM THE COMIC BOOK STORE.
  • BEN POPKEN WRITES
  • Splitsider
  • Justin Lamb
  • Miss Alice Teeple
  • Cody Lindquist
  • Astronaut
  • SOANDSO&SOANDSO&SOANDSO
  • Drew is Alright I Guess
  • The Comic's Comic
  • the YONI-VERSE
  • Holy Toledo!
  • Matthew Brian Cohen - Tumblr Fun Edition
  • This Awkward Pause
  • Mike Scollins.
  • Obsessive Pop Culture Disorder
  • Dan Hodapp
  • Will Hines
  • kale + kittens
  • Rob Michael Hugel Is Here
  • JAKE FOGELNEST
  • Madalyn Baldanzi?
  • Pod Awful
  • Comedy Nerds United!
  • ///Robot Riley///
  • Time's Up, Pencils Down
  • Abbi Crutchfield
  • Sachi Ezura
  • Welcome .
  • Dawn Luebbe
  • BRYAN RUCKER
  • THE NEED TO FAIL
  • L in Translation
  • Quoz
  • Too Much Nick
  • Mitchell Stephen Fesh
  • Soup
  • Eye On Springfield
  • Everything Perfect for Everyone Forever
  • curious gracie
  • Dan Harmon Poops
  • Poupak's Parisian Life in New York
  • PREMIUM FISHER
  • Sesame Street
  • PAUL BRIGANTI
  • 404ing It
  • chirs pirnicpe
  • sal gentile
  • Above Average Productions
  • Halle Kiefer
  • El T
  • e. e. cunnings
  • Rudel
  • Nate Cartoons
  • Alex French
  • Ratiocination
  • Julia Wiedeman
  • Kayaking Upstream
  • Digsy Is Comics
  • The Broken Record
  • Drag Me To Hejl!
  • Philanthropy Girl
  • Stupid Gloves
  • Macarony Productions
  • Onassis Comedy
  • My mother was right.
  • "A mind with a heart of its own"
  • Zach Gibson!
  • Pour Me Out ALREADY
  • ben wietmarschen
  • An Outfit For Every Season
  • Dylan Donahue
  • Winston Noel and the Blog of the Same Name
  • Sorry About Last Night...
  • Bye, Raleigh
  • A Funny Thing
  • Brown's Mumbler
  • Fake Criterions
  • UCB Love
  • Hi, I'm Katherine.
  • MAMRIE!
  • Too Lazy
  • Internet Farts
  • Keith Kingbay
  • BEN POPKEN IS JUST KIDDING
  • Adam Bozarth Enjoys the Internet
  • Veronica Writes Stuff
  • Casey Donahue
  • benzado
  • Hioo Journal
  • www.annarubanova.com
  • MuchTooMuch
  • Kevin Hines
  • Caroline Behind the Desk
  • James Dwyer
  • routine curation
  • The Company
  • Michl Hartny.
  • The Monkeys You Ordered
  • lanyard
  • The Kirk Larsen Questperience
  • AMERICA WON'T SHUT UP!
  • Sex Your Food
  • Gabbin' Like Gals
  • This Tumblr's Dumb
  • UCB Conspiracy
  • My Name Is Bluvband
  • Aaron Burdette
  • Talking Breakfast?!
  • comedy stuff
  • School Night
  • Hello Melissa Gomez
  • Showtime
  • Shut UP! Storytelling Show
  • (write it) like disaster
  • had we but world enough, and time
  • Ryan Hitchcock's Valid and Important Thoughts.
  • And Now for Something Completely Different
  • I Was Born To Ramble
  • Josh Patten
  • Georgie Aldaco
  • hey, it's sanji
  • HMS Got 'Em
  • JuliaWard!
  • Feitumblr
  • THE PROM COMEDY
  • Foxish Foibles
  • TEN IDEAS
  • The Apiary
  • Improv Is Easy!
  • "More Than You Need to Know" by Geezus H.
  • Hit The Mark! with Mark Levy
  • Astonishing Brett White
  • It's Like Anything
  • talk back at the ocean
  • KPARTYAWESOME
  • I Wear T. Shirts
  • LOSERBEAM
  • RamseyEss
  • Benjamin Apple
  • Darren Miller
  • Brandon Scott Wolf
  • It's A Shame About Amy
  • also ellena.
  • UCB Difference
  • brianglidewell.jpg
  • Visitors at the podium
  • Kindle the fire in your chest.
  • tall, dark & handsome.
  • I'm Ben Warheit
  • District 9 and 3 Quarters
  • Baguette-me-nots
  • Thrillcox
  • Riding the Struggle Bus, Living the Dream
  • That's So Jackson
  • Improv Nonsense
  • Sarah Rainone is not for sale.
  • Improv Logos
  • beyond the river
  • Little Hands, Big Heart
  • Charlie Todd
  • Amos "Amos" Vernon
  • Eliot Glazer
  • Peter Sherer
  • Anna Callegari
  • Matt Moskovciak
  • nate dern
  • On The Cusp, Off The Cuff
  • Matt Dennie Blog Dot Gov
  • Matthew S. Starr
  • brandon scott jones
  • MORGAN PHILLIPS
  • krst(y)lpzbrnl
  • Avery Monsen Dot Comsen
  • Klepper & Grey
  • The Eggs and Cheese I Love
  • testingdistance
  • Alarm Sundae
  • Oliver Shmoliver
  • Popcorn Undone
  • The Cookie Bonster
  • THENICKKOCHER.COM
  • The Whiskey Rebellion
  • This is Ben Rameaka
  • This is blog.
  • lamb, scott
Cheshire - Created by Alter Imaging
9 months ago | 270 notes
ourvaluedcustomers:

While showing off her new surgically altered ‘ELF EARS’…

This is genuinely one of the most heartbreaking things I’ve ever read.

ourvaluedcustomers:

While showing off her new surgically altered ‘ELF EARS’…

This is genuinely one of the most heartbreaking things I’ve ever read.

  1. dancinmadz reblogged this from ourvaluedcustomers
  2. plughumper reblogged this from cleverpablo
  3. froggytown reblogged this from ourvaluedcustomers
  4. daisenseiben reblogged this from ourvaluedcustomers and added:
    Sweet Jesus. Please people, right NOW, go google ‘inherited traits’. Read the Wikipedia article. All of it. Save us all...
  5. postindyinc reblogged this from ourvaluedcustomers
  6. suilean-dubh reblogged this from ourvaluedcustomers and added:
    I would have actually lost my shit if I had heard that THAT IS NOT HOW GENETICS WORK
  7. sayrawr reblogged this from ourvaluedcustomers
  8. ashkevha reblogged this from ourvaluedcustomers
  9. a-stegosaurus reblogged this from ourvaluedcustomers and added:
    Oh that hurts.
  10. sirhellsing420 reblogged this from bonwor
  11. bonwor reblogged this from ourvaluedcustomers
  12. kissmycloaca reblogged this from ourvaluedcustomers and added:
    These people need to die.
  13. triforce-kun reblogged this from ourvaluedcustomers and added:
    It sounds like somebody is a fan of Lamarck’s “inheritance of acquired characteristics” hypothesis. Too bad Lamarck was...
  14. wes-krill reblogged this from ourvaluedcustomers
  15. flintlock reblogged this from hayleyquinzel
  16. skitscat reblogged this from ourvaluedcustomers and added:
    oh god no please dont reproduce
  17. peachpareblogging reblogged this from ourvaluedcustomers
  18. captainpyjamas reblogged this from ourvaluedcustomers and added:
    This is why you need to teach evolution in schools. Remember all those babies born with their parents’ tattoos already...
  19. cattomboy reblogged this from ourvaluedcustomers
  20. part2of3 reblogged this from ourvaluedcustomers
  21. galaxycunt reblogged this from ourvaluedcustomers
  22. hayleyquinzel reblogged this from ourvaluedcustomers and added:
    ….. please don’t breed.
  23. shadow-jackal reblogged this from crimsondude and added:
    LOL! I really need to come up with a good poser character concept…
  24. crimsondude reblogged this from ourvaluedcustomers and added:
    Negative Quality: Elf Poser [+5 BP]
  25. acciomjollnir reblogged this from bluelightseven
  26. guyalice reblogged this from ourvaluedcustomers
  27. shadedspriter reblogged this from ourvaluedcustomers and added:
    HUMANITY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
  28. for-the-proud-people-of-robonia reblogged this from ourvaluedcustomers
  29. pmayes reblogged this from ourvaluedcustomers
  30. 404blognotfound reblogged this from ourvaluedcustomers and added:
    … ಠ_ಠ
  31. jheaton416 reblogged this from ourvaluedcustomers and added:
    In fairness, that *is* pretty much how comic-cook genetics works, so...confusion is...
Via OVC: CONVERSATIONS FROM THE COMIC BOOK STORE.