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Stingray ‘photobomb’ goes viral

oh god. oh god. oh god. oh god. oh god. oh god.

THIS! THIS IS WHY, PEOPLE! They sneak up on you! I don’t care if the beast is being propped up by the man behind it. It is a horror. A straight out horror.

Never going near ocean again. Done. Over.

Here’s is the (terrifying) quote from the article, tips on how to behave around sting rays at this park built around letting people hang out with sting rays:

If you dive or deep snorkel, wear a “skin” or light wet-suit to protect from stingray “hickies.” Stingrays cannot see what they are feeding upon and they eat by sucking the food into their mouths between two hard dental plates. Sometimes they can get confused by all the feeding going on, and since they don’t feed by sight, they just start sucking as they approach the food source (divers).

Remember, the ray hunts by sense of smell so you can lead a ray around for quite a while with just one piece of bait—actually just long enough to get bushwhacked by another ray coming in from another angle.

Many folks just let go of the bait the first time or two—the ray misses the fish and it gets taken by one of the ever-present Cayman Piranha. These fish are actually the real threat here, they can come and give you a rather sharp bite on the finger to help encourage you to give them the bait.

WHY DO PEOPLE DO THIS? Stingrays and piranhas?! What is wrong with people?!

They let you feed stingrays at the New England Aquarium in Boston. When they nibble on your hand you barely feel it. It doesn’t feel anything like a hickie and I should know as I have had more hickies then I can count! (1). I think this photo reminds us that the real threat from Stingrays is that they are rude to tourists. Right after this photo was taken, another stingray refused to give these three ladies directions back to their hotel and when they were finally able to hail a sea-cab their stringray cab driver completely overcharged them and would not stop talking on this seatooth headset the whole time.

I have a legitimate fear of things I can’t see underwater touching me. Years ago, I went on a cruise with my family. One of the activities we did was feeding sting rays like this.

It sounded like a good idea. Hell, I might have even suggested it. But, once we got in the water and the first one brushed up against my leg from behind, I was done. So fucking unpleasant.

I never even tried to feed one.